Registering, or, thoughts on materialism

Today our first wedding gift came in the mail and I can barely contain my excitement.

I mean, if you think about, registries really are like magic. You go, aim this little scanner at all the things that you have wanted to buy for yourself for a long time but felt pathetic about it like, and BAM, lots of them start miraculously arriving at your house.

Of course, registering was also really stressful, as James and I felt super guilty about burdening our guests with having to buy us stuff, so we originally registered for almost nothing. The poor Bed, Bath, and Beyond lady kept on trying to convince us that we needed dish towels, sheet sets for our guest bedroom (um hello, have you seen the price of DC apartments? Guest room? Ha!), luggage sets, and all sorts of overpriced silly kitchen stuff. But since I – having loved nesting for a long time – already have lots of random little things, we only put things on there that we really wanted. Over the course of the next couple weeks, I proceeded to take a bunch of stuff off because I decided we really didn’t need it. Then, when my mother pointed out that our guest list might cover more than the 72 items on our registry, I have been slowly adding things back.

But you worry (at least I did), what people will think of you, based on what you asked for. Will they think I am actually a violent psychopath because I asked for lots of knives? Will the judge me for my love of cake stands? Will they think we are pompous because of our taste in china? Will they be concerned that we are opening a beer garden because we registered for 36 beer steins? (Actually, that last one was because we messed up the scanner thing and somehow registered for enough beer glasses to furnish a small German pub. Don’t worry – the situation has been rectified.)

But what I hope people feel is excitement about the home that James and I are establishing, about the hospitality we will extend on those china plates, about the church bake sale cookies we will furnish with that buttercup yellow Kitchenaid mixer, about meals we will prepare for others in those new pots.  Because that is what James and I felt as we added each thing: giddy, about building a home together and filling it with stuff we like to extend hospitality to the people we love.

Ok, I’ll admit – I’m a registry stalker. I periodically call James late at night and scream things like “SOMEONE JUST BOUGHT A HAND TOWEL!!!!!!” and he wonders if I’ve gone insane. But I get excited knowing that someone else is thinking about the event that I think about 24/7. It’s like waiting for your birthday, only better. So when this first gift (the most perfect fat little white pitcher) came today, I was ecstatic. It is from my dear friend Jessie, and having it show up at my door was just a sweet reminder that James and I will be starting out our marriage with an army of people behind us, rooting us on. Not to mention the fact that we will be starting our marriage with a pitcher!

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10 Responses to Registering, or, thoughts on materialism

  1. Lawson Stone says:

    So…did you ever register at Lowes or Tractor Supply? ;-)

  2. redhairedrebel says:

    The pitcher is perfect!!! :-)

    (And, I have to admit to feeling a lot better that you, too, worried about all that with registering. . .)

    • hs87 says:

      Glad I could put you at ease! : ) I will say, one of the best things we did was BEFORE going and registering, we printed off the online lists that all the big stores have of what you “must” register for. Then we went through, crossed off what we didn’t need, and then went ahead and researched the brands we wanted for what we did want. This meant that we did fewer impulse scans at the store . . . with several notable bright yellow or pitcher shaped exceptions. ; )

  3. Barbara Bushey says:

    Oh, you have it exactly right: we nourish you so you can nourish each other. We celebrate your marriage so that we can all celebrate our marriages. We want everyone to know how important commitment is to a joyous existence. But now, WHERE DID THAT PITCHER COME FROM? I MUST HAVE ONE!. (ok, we DO live in a material world. It might as well be beautiful.)

    • hs87 says:

      I agree — it should be beautiful! : ) The pitcher is just from Bed, Bath, and Beyond — I fell in love with it and plan to use it all the time!

  4. I know exactly what you mean, about the whole will-people-judge-me-for-my-registry-items thing. And the oh-shucks-we-don’t-really-need-thaaaat-much-stuff thing… but then having my (more realistic) mother say “Hon, you do realize, you’re inviting quite a few people and some of them WILL WANT TO SPEND SERIOUS MONEY ON YOU. It’s okay.”

    I still felt guilty about the KitchenAid.

    (How I love it now, though… mine is apple green.)

    It is magic, isn’t it? You go shopping but someone else foots the bill!

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